The Mayans have predicted that the world will end on the 21st of this month, leaving me only nine days to write up a bucket list. I don’t have to worry about accomplishing everything in that period because if you believe the Mayans, I have a bridge…
I checked Google to see what everyone else was putting on their list. After scanning about thirty or so sites, I have decided that many Bucket Lists were written by people who have lived in a shell for most of their lives or their most remarkable moment in life was winning the 5th-grade spelling bee.
Here are a few of the very many, followed by my list:
“Eat at one of the
best restaurants” – Why? The best meal in the world is a home-cooked meal
with your loved ones. The person probably never ate at anything fancier than
Applebee’s.
“Solve a Rubik’s Cube”
– this idiot didn’t know you could snap it apart and put it together solved.
“Finish a Jigsaw
puzzle” – is there a person alive who has not solved even a five-piece
puzzle?
“Become a lifelong
collector of something that fascinates you” – oops, too late!
“Bathe in the Ganges River During the Purna Kumbh Mela “–
Seriously? Have you seen the disgusting filth that floats in that river? Who in
their right mind would want to bathe with 2000 other people anyway?
“Float Around The
Dead Sea” – Why wait until you die? Dying in the Dead Sea sounds more
poetic.
“Write your last will”
– I can’t think of anything more depressing or morbid.
“Milk a cow” – I
think Farmer Al wrote this one. This is really on a Bucket list!
“Fast for three days”
– are you kidding me? I’m going to stuff my face with every calorie and fat-loaded
food I can find.
Here’s my bucket list:
1. Drink An Obscene Amount Of Beer at a German Hofbrau
2. Become a Fighter Pilot for a Day and Shoot Things
3. Party Again at Mardi Gras
4. Party at the Rio Carnival
5. Tour the Titanic Wreckage At the Bottom of the Atlantic
6. Attend Every Cirque du Soleil Show
And with my last breath, I’ll exhale my love for my wife, family, and friends. I hope it’s a cold day so you can see what you have meant to me.
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