Winter Doldrums

    Al Roker of NBC often says, “That’s what’s going on around the country; here’s what’s happening in your neck of the woods” when transitioning from the national weather broadcast to the local affiliate. These are the words I hate to hear in the wintertime as I listen to the local forecast.

    Darkness. Rain. Punishing winds. Gray skies. “Oh God, when will it end?” These are some words that come to mind when thinking of Vermont winters.

    September, when the sun still occasionally shines in Vermont, is an excellent moment to prepare yourself mentally, physically, and spiritually for the coming winter, which I call “the dark time.”

    Darkness will descend upon the land very quickly. One October morning, you wake up around 7:00 a.m., and it’s still light out, and the birds are singing, but seemingly only a few mornings later, after Daylight Savings,  you will notice it’s as dark as midnight. Every day, it seems like you lose a half hour of sunlight.

    Some people embrace the winter. “Maybe we will get snow and ice this year!” they say hopefully as if that’s a good thing. But not all are so enthusiastic. A friend once  told me the only sensible thing to do would be to “move all of Vermont, brick by brick, to the south of France.”

    The days and nights lead many to despair. Don’t let this happen to you! Here are some tips for surviving the Vermont winter.

*   Start talking early and often about how much you look forward to spring. Keep telling yourself that “spring is coming soon,” even when it’s December, January, or February.

*   Light many candles to re-create this same magical ambiance in the comfort of your home and maybe a fire in your wood-burning stove or fireplace.

* You don’t need a lot of fancy equipment to make fondue, but consider this your excuse to get a fondue pot if you’ve been looking for one. Slice up some fruit and crusty bread, grab some crackers or veggies and cubed meat, and get to dipping in your choice of cheese, chocolate, or hot oil.

* Make yourself a cup of tea, grab a comfy blanket, and cozy up with a good book. Escaping into another world feels especially great when a snowstorm roars outside.

* Doing puzzles can help fight brain aging, not to mention the hours slipping by. Buy one at a local gift shop and set up a table in the house, or browse the many sites on the Internet offering puzzles.

* How about getting in your comfy jammies, grabbing a cup of hot chocolate, and spending chill time binge-watching a fun TV series?

* Read by the fire. The fire is even better when you have a great book to read.

    Suppose you are inclined to go outdoors and risk frostbite, slipping and falling, or breaking a hip. You can start by running around the house looking for your winter boots that you “packed away” for the summer and a pair of heavy wool socks. Wearing a heavy parka, a scarf, and your Faux Fur Trapper Cap would be best.

Here are some ideas for enjoying the great outdoors.

* Go skiing or snowboarding, a sport the whole family can enjoy. Of course, a lift ticket will cost you over a hundred dollars, and you must pay for parking. If it is jam-packed, the lift lines will be long, and you might get ten runs during the day. Don’t forget the cost of equipment.

* Go sledding. Sledding is one of those simple joys people of any age can enjoy. The next time you get served with a few inches of snow, head outside with a sled and find a tall but not too steep hill near you. You must be careful and not lose control of your sled and crash into a tree.

* Take a winter hike or snowshoeing.  You’ll want to wear several layers of clothing to help you stay dry and comfortable, and aim to cover as much of your bare skin as possible. The chances of getting frostbite or hypothermia are great. You also might get lost.

* Build a snowman.  Building a snowman is a favorite winter activity, but you don’t have to be 12 or under to enjoy patching your own Frosty together. Create a unique silhouette or non-traditional accessories to personalize your snow sculpture. You could try to build one to look like Trump. You will need a lot of orange-colored food dye for the face and a handful of yellow straw for some hair.

* Have a snowball fight with your neighbor, but make sure you wear protective headgear, as he has a habit of freezing the globs of snow.

   Winter, of course, is cold and flu season. Wash your hands frequently in hot water and soap. 

    Despite all precautions, you may develop a condition known as “perma-cold,” whereby you have cold symptoms for four solid months, and you may believe you are dying. No matter how miserable you become, most doctors will be philosophical about your suffering and prescribe only tea and sleep. Other people will suggest traditional remedies such as  Jägermeister.

     Further, develop and refine your convictions about Vermont weather. Is it better when it’s freezing and icy because at least you can see some blue sky? Or do you prefer the perpetual gray weather? Is the weather predestined, or is it just a matter of chance?